Stump Lane
in the dirt since history began

“‘I think people who want to be a citizen of this country ought to learn English and they ought to learn to sing the national anthem in English,’ Bush said.” (Baltimore Sun,CBS, FOX news…) Yes. The irony is palpable.

21st Century Rich

So, Greg Palast says that in an uncharacteristic display of competence, OFFAL is able, in his own way, to truly declare, “mission accomplished” in Iraq. (The mission in Iraq being to drive up the price of oil, as a favor to his buddies in the business.) Some don’t think it was such an act of competence, but rather just of blind loyalty to the same buddies — who do seem to have benefited quite nicely as they’re hauling in record-crushing profits, and in at least one highly publicized case, deploying an astounding $398 million golden parachute. If that isn’t the measure of success and accomplishment in this bold nation of ours, than I don’t know what is!

But which amoral creature is OFFAL? A highly capable Machiavellian oil baron? Or an incompetent, hapless stooge to his oily overlords? What is it that drives the man to deadly acts of violence and exploitation?

He just doesn’t give a fuck.

This is a guy who wants to be liked. He wants to please everybody; and he’s insanely optimistic about his ability to do so. But here’s the catch: he doesn’t give a fuck if you’re actually pleased once you’re no longer in the same room with him!

The oilers secret to winning his loyalty? Stay in the same room with him at all times. Who else but those playing for the highest of financial stakes would have the staying power and the constitution to endure such a regimen?

Why else would his handlers be so careful to keep him isolated? Could you imagine the havoc that would be wrought if the ‘wrong’ folks were allowed access to the room? He’d be calling off wars, housing hurricane survivors, pledging to do something about genocide in Sudan, or funding research into alternative energy so that we could reduce our oil dependence…

STOP IT! YOU’RE SCARING ME!

Don’t worry, Dear Reader, OFFAL is still safe and sound in his bubble. And besides, he just doesn’t give a fuck.

Yeah. Anyway — there’s this Neil Shakespeare guy who does cut-and-paste artwork and he has a blog and a website about it. It’s pretty neat stuff. On the blog, he writes stories to go with it.

In looking at his work, an idea occurred to me that I might try my hand at one. Above is my attempt.

It sucks.

The painting in the background is The Rich by Fernando Botero. The Hummer and Our Leaders I found lying around on the internets.

Check out how it’s really done.

Here is some news from The Independent:

However, even if everything goes relatively smoothly, costs until a phase-out is complete could top $370bn. This would make the Iraq conflict, now into its fourth year, more expensive financially than the Vietnam War, which lasted eight years. Vietnam claimed 58,000 American lives, far more than the almost 2,400 lost in Iraq thus far. But in today’s dollars it cost “only” $549bn, much less than the $690bn for Iraq, and a projected combined $811bn bill for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. [Iraq war set to be more expensive than Vietnam]

Your Montag is on the record as being against the war in Iraq— at least I think have been clear on this —and I think we are doing a disservice to our country financially by having this conflict, tax cuts for the wealthy and record budget deficits all at once. But let’s not be crass about this morbid financial benchmark. After all, it was just yesterday when Your Montag said exactly this:

This is a symptom of our money-centric definition of value. Blood and limbs are valuable, too.

And lives.

It was right there in the Independent article: “Vietnam claimed 58,000 American lives,” and I am sure the numbers are even more astounding on the Vietnamese side (estimates range well into the millions.) The Iraq war has seen the death of at least 34512 Iraqis and 2611 coalition forces thus far. The numbers are horrifying in both cases.

I guess what I am saying is that— assuming we are morally obligated to act and our objective is morally acceptable —wars should be judged in these terms: “Is achieving the objective worth the cost in human lives?”

Not: “Is achieving the objective worth the financial costs?”

Nor: “Can we achieve our objective in this war while killing fewer people than were killed in Vietnam?”

And certainly not: “Dollar for dollar, as compared with the Vietnam war, are we getting enough bang for our buck as it relates to the benefits of achieving our objective?”

Let’s first concentrate on the following questions:

1. Were we morally obligated to act in Iraq?
2. Are we morally obligated to continue?
3. Is our objective in Iraq morally acceptable?
4. Wait a minute. What the fuck is our objective in Iraq, anyway? Be honest.

We have to answer these questions before the human accounting can begin. I get the feeling that third one is going to be a fucking tough nut to crack, though. You can tell me all day our objective is to bring Western Democracy to Iraq, but when we’re torturing the population, setting up permanent military bases and prying the oil industry open to foreign investment, people are bound to wonder.

Another amazing story from this morning’s NYT, detailing Rumzz-n-Condee’s “surprise” visit to Baghdad. Here’s what Rumsfeld had to say: “This is a sovereign country, and they’re making impressive progress.” Let’s divide this pithy quote into two parts: (A) Iraq is a sovereign country; (B) Iraq is making “impressive progress.” Then, let’s look at some quotes from the rest of the very same story, which fall under one of the two categories, “sovereignty” or “progress.”

(A) Sovereignty:

“Clearly this new Iraqi government must perform on behalf of the Iraqi people,” said James Wilkinson, a senior adviser to the Secretary, who helped plan the trip. “But the new government also gives us a chance to correct our mistakes and do our part to make Iraq work.”

Under American pressure, Mr. Jaafari stepped aside earlier this month and his Shiite bloc designated Mr. Maliki, a relatively unknown and untested leader, as the person to try to form a new government.

Over the objections of the State Department, Mr. Rumsfeld took control of Iraqi reconstruction and made key decisions, such as disbanding the Iraqi Army…

[Rephrase: a functioning Iraqi government, let alone one that "performs on behalf of the Iraqi people," is something referred to in the future tense by administration officials. And I believe them - this same administration apparently played a crucial role in changing out the Prime Minister of this "sovereign" country, let alone trashing the whole place, bungling reconstruction, "disbanding the" (sovereign, I guess) "Iraqi army," and so on.]

(B) Progress:

…this visit offered perhaps a last chance to reverse some of the mistakes of the last three years in providing security for Iraq, getting the oil and power systems back and curbing sectarian hatreds and corruption within the Iraqi government.

A system of American teams for each province has had trouble getting off the ground and exists in only five provinces, including Baghdad.

State Department officials have been alarmed in recent weeks as sectarian killings have increased and the previous Iraqi government seemed incapable of dealing with the violence.

Of particular concern to the Bush administration has been the infiltration by Shiite militias of Iraq’s security and military forces. In some cases, the militias have carried out their own killings, in retaliation against Sunni-sponsored attacks, setting off a cycle of Sunni-Shiite violence.

…last month when Ms. Rice commented that the United States had made “thousands of tactical errors” in Iraq and Mr. Rumsfeld said he did not know what she was talking about.

[Rephrase: Increasing sectarian violence, "thousands of tactical errors," oil and power systems still not back online after years, rise of militias and possible de-centralization of the Iraqi military into local or sectarian militias, ineffective American support for reconstruction efforts, a weakened Iraqi government...and this is just in this story; not to mention increasing loss of U.S. troops, declining support for the war among constituents in the U.S., increasing tension in the region as a whole, the re-empowerment of religious conservatives and the potential rise of Iran as a nuclear power, and so on.]

So if I may: Rumsfeld’s quote, in the real world (or even just to fit in with the rest of the NYT story), would have read: “This is a country occupied by a self-interested and incompetent foreign power, and things are going downhill fast.”

In an Associated Press article about the Catholic Church doing a study on condom use to prevent the spread of HIV, there was this passage conveying the thoughts of the Cardinal in charge of the Vatican’s health care ministry:

Lozano Barragan has also said in past comments that condoms could sometimes be condoned, such as when a woman can’t refuse her HIV-positive husband’s sexual advances.

Ok. If you have HIV, and want to rape your wife, it’s ok to use a condom.

WTF?!

Associated Press: Vatican to Issue Document on Condom Use

People don’t need insurance; they need primary healthcare.

Weathered

Random 11 — Volume 9 (A filler post.)

Here is a random list of musical songs. No audit, no ratings. If you’re incredibly bored, feel free to rate them in the comments. The only stipulation is that #4 be rated on an 8 to 10 scale rather than 1 to 10 like the rest. (New Tool May 2nd.)

1. Silver — The Pixies
2. St. Jimmy — Green Day*
3. Subculture — New Order
4. Sober** — Tool
5. Woodpecker From Mars — Faith No More
6. Children’s Story — Slick Rick
7. Every Day is Exactly the Same — Nine Inch Nails
8. Punk Rock Classic — The Red Hot Chili Peppers
9. Dracula — Gorillaz
10. I Wonder — Blind Melon
11. The Package — A Perfect Circle

Bonus #12: All Over the World — The Pixies (A true bonus!)

Nothing out of the ordinary this week. Safe bet most anybody reading this, is already aware of all of these bands. At least Your Montag gets deep album tracks; because when I rip a CD, I go ahead and put the whole dang thing on the music playing nonPod device.

*I'm not especially proud of this one. I didn't particularly like Green Day from the start, but gave them a second chance due to American Idiot. Should I not have?

**It's on 'shuffle' I swear. Don't know what's up with all the 'S' songs.

P.S.: NO WAR IN IRAN — This is where my head’s at on Iran.